Relational trauma, shock trauma and chronic stress disconnect us from our body. Our mind-body connection, that’s central to knowing the self, maintaining a healthy system and navigating life, is diminished.
Various cognitive, emotional and physiological mechanisms facilitate this progressive sense of disconnection. For example, we often become increasingly stuck in our heads. We overthink, ruminate, plan, worry and try to ‘figure things out.’ In an unpredictable world, full of potential emotional pain or (God forbid) mistakes, this hypervigilant escapism allows us to both avoid and feel in control.
Whether our mind-body disconnection is maintained through obsessive thinking, co-dependency, anxiety, compulsive busyness, zoning out watching TV, or any of the other clever ways we try and protect ourselves, the outcome is the same:
to protect the self, we sacrifice the system
By subconsciously doing whatever’s necessary to shield the self from painful emotions, we lose connection to our system We cut ourselves off from our body’s rhythms, needs and sensations. We live in ‘override’ mode: no longer responding, allowing and flowing, instead ignoring, resisting and pushing in a different direction.
The nervous system is designed to follow a 90 minute rythm: 75 minutes of activity and upregulation and 15 minutes of rest and down regulation. Do you rest and allow your system to take the time it needs to process and recharge, or do you override it? Forcing ourselves to stand, run, think, do and push forward triggers our fight, flight, freeze response. In short, it compounds the dysregulation in our nervous system and moves us further into trauma patterns that don’t serve us.
Freedom is found as we re-establish the mind-body connection. By curiously listening to our body we help it to return to its natural rhythm.
I hope this note helps you remember to find ways to bring rhythm into your system and your life this week. Please get in touch if you have any ideas for future notes – it helps so much to know what you need.
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Sarah Woodhouse is a trauma expert, research psychologist and writer who delivers people the knowledge and tools to recognise and overcome self-defeating cycles, to achieve personal freedom and success. Please follow her on Instagram, Facebook or X for all the latest updates.
