notes on freedom
A weekly email series containing easily digestible morsels of info on relational trauma and how to find freedom from it.
THIS WEEK IT’S A NOTE ON…taking it one day at a time
Childhood trauma leaves every single one of us with some common issues that get worse over time.
We have an overactive fight-flight-freeze response, so even fairly benign daily stressors can tip us into a highly adrenalized state. We get used to operating from a place of adrenalized anxiety and we easily move into overwhelm or ‘functional freeze’. This is our ‘normal.’
We also have painful buried core beliefs that don’t serve us and are easily triggered. Beliefs like ‘I’m a failure’ or ‘I’m getting everything wrong’ are common within this community. These beliefs make work and relationships very challenging.
To cope with the triggered nervous system dysregulation and the painful sham-based beliefs, we develop unhelpful coping that keeps us stuck within the dysregulation. For example, many of us are compulsive doers, eaters or co-dependent people-pleasers.
Over time we develop a way of being that traps us in the dysregulation and prevents us from healing.
Healing, then, requires us to learn a new way of being..
Healing relational trauma is possible for all of us, but it requires us to accept that we are being called to do things differently. And this takes time.
To learn a ‘new way of being’ we have no choice but to take it one day at a time. What other sane choice is there?! It took decades to create a life that traps us in dysregulation. Of course it’s going to take time to create a life that supports regulation and healing.
– Just for today can you self-care?
– Just for today can you rest a little more?
– Just for today can you slow down?
– Just for today can you speak to yourself a little more kindly?
– Just for today can you be a little more present?
Yes, you can.
Just for today you can choose to ‘do it differently’.
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Sarah Woodhouse is a trauma expert, research psychologist and writer who delivers people the knowledge and tools to recognise and overcome self-defeating cycles, to achieve personal freedom and success. Please follow her on Instagram, Facebook or X for all the latest updates.
